3/27/03

What Do You Think Christina Aguilera Is Doing Right Now

Fagatron sent me what is probably the greatest song ever composed The band is Shat and the song is "What Do You Think Christina Aguilera Is Doing Right Now?". Check it out mother fagots.

In the year 2000, Christina Aguilara is rushed to the ER, and almost dies on the table when doctors relize that no ammount of scrubbing can get her clean.

On google this site is ranked #44 for the keyword "christina aguilera pictures". I so rule!

Thanks go out to Fat Mouse for creating this photoshop madness.

I've been saying it for years and this website proves it babies are stupid.

"Lesbian pop duo Tatu claim they have sex with each other three times a day." I think someones 15 minutes of fame is fading fast. I can't wait tell next week when Tatu will claim they are now having sex with each other FIVE times a day! I don't think you people get it! We are teenage lezbos that have sex with each other! Buy our cd!

Crazy Jap Computer Ads 1 | Crazy Jap Computer Ads 2

Peter Van Stralen amazing photos of the human body.

Carmen Electra trashy photos of the human body.

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3/26/03

I knew this war would showcase many crimes against humanity but I had no idea it would get this bad this fast. Clint Black has released a pro war song called "I Raq and Roll." Get it, Iraq, I Raq, its a play on words with the subtlety of a sledge hammer. Lets take a look at some of the not clever at all lyrics.

"IT MIGHT BE A SMART BOMB
THEY FIND STUPID PEOPLE TOO
AND IF YOU STAND WITH THE LIKES OF SADDAM
ONE JUST MIIGHT FIND YOU

NOW YOU CAN COME ALONG
OR YOU CAN STAY BEHIND
OR YOU CAN GET OUT OF THE WAY
BUT OUR TROOPS TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE
FOR THE GOOD OLD U.S.A.

I ROCK, I RACK'EM UP AND I ROLL
IN THE USA
I ROCK, I RACK'EM UP AND I ROLL
I'M TALKIN' ABOUT THE USA"

This song is so bad it makes me miss both Alan Jackson's and Paul McCartney's shity songs about 9-11.

If your stomach can take it you can check out the rest of the lyrics here and download the song here.

By the way, I don't know much about Clint Black but judging by his picture he must be some kind of a 3 foot retarded midget cowboy country singer. Look at the picture! He's not right!

Perfect Echo | Outbreed | Big Dark Cloud

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3/25/03

You Got To Love The Pirate Nun

Who would have thought the Al-Jazeerah even had cartoons? This one is my favorite.

Marylen Costumes has some gay ass costumes. If you've ever dreamed of dressing as say a traffic cone or a book this is your place.

If we can't tell the nice white kids from Canada from the terrorists we're screwed.

4809 people should die. Really, get over it.

"U.S. officials said Monday that no chemical weapons were found at a suspected site at Najaf in central Iraq, U.S. television networks reported.

NBC News reported from the Pentagon that no chemicals at all were found at the site. CNN, also reporting from the Pentagon, said officials now believe the plant there was abandoned long ago by the Iraqis."

Looks like Mr Bush still needs a smoking gunn.

WHOOOOO DOOOOODZ

What is Victoria's Secret? That is some funny shit.

All you PC loven mother bitches get ready for the mother fucking revolution.

This is some crazy shit. Fur Suit Sex would have blew my mind but ALL NEW GAY Fur Suit Sex, well I don't want to belive it.

If your standing in front of a bulldozer and you see it coming and let it hit you, you lose.

ROX

Marsi from em-rocka.org thinks I ROX but I totally think SHE ROX!

TOM JONES

Pastor Jack, Spirituality & The Tom Jones Connection!?!?

If you enjoyed todays update please feel free to and let me know what an awesome dude I am. One more thing, plug, plug, and plug.

3/19/03

A Letter from Michael Moore to George W. Bush on the Eve of War

George W. Bush
1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Washington, DC

Dear Governor Bush:

So today is what you call "the moment of truth," the day that "France and the rest of world have to show their cards on the table." I'm glad to hear that this day has finally arrived. Because, I gotta tell ya, having survived 440 days of your lying and conniving, I wasn't sure if I could take much more. So I'm glad to hear that today is Truth Day, 'cause I got a few truths I would like to share with you:

1. There is virtually NO ONE in America (talk radio nutters and Fox News aside) who is gung-ho to go to war. Trust me on this one. Walk out of the White House and on to any street in America and try to find five people who are PASSIONATE about wanting to kill Iraqis. YOU WON'T FIND THEM! Why? 'Cause NO Iraqis have ever come here and killed any of us! No Iraqi has even threatened to do that. You see, this is how we average Americans think: If a certain so-and-so is not perceived as a threat to our lives, then, believe it or not, we don't want to kill him! Funny how that works!

2. The majority of Americans -- the ones who never elected you -- are not fooled by your weapons of mass distraction. We know what the real issues are that affect our daily lives -- and none of them begin with I or end in Q. Here's what threatens us: two and a half million jobs lost since you took office, the stock market having become a cruel joke, no one knowing if their retirement funds are going to be there, gas now costs almost two dollars -- the list goes on and on. Bombing Iraq will not make any of this go away. Only you need to go away for things to improve.

3. As Bill Maher said last week, how bad do you have to suck to lose a popularity contest with Saddam Hussein? The whole world is against you, Mr. Bush. Count your fellow Americans among them.

4. The Pope has said this war is wrong, that it is a SIN. The Pope! But even worse, the Dixie Chicks have now come out against you! How bad does it have to get before you realize that you are an army of one on this war? Of course, this is a war you personally won't have to fight. Just like when you went AWOL while the poor were shipped to Vietnam in your place.

5. Of the 535 members of Congress, only ONE (Sen. Johnson of South Dakota) has an enlisted son or daughter in the armed forces! If you really want to stand up for America, please send your twin daughters over to Kuwait right now and let them don their chemical warfare suits. And let's see every member of Congress with a child of military age also sacrifice their kids for this war effort. What's that you say? You don't THINK so? Well, hey, guess what -- we don't think so either!

6. Finally, we love France. Yes, they have pulled some royal screw-ups. Yes, some of them can be pretty damn annoying. But have you forgotten we wouldn't even have this country known as America if it weren't for the French? That it was their help in the Revolutionary War that won it for us? That our greatest thinkers and founding fathers -- Thomas Jefferson, Ben Franklin, etc. -- spent many years in Paris where they refined the concepts that lead to our Declaration of Independence and our Constitution? That it was France who gave us our Statue of Liberty, a Frenchman who built the Chevrolet, and a pair of French brothers who invented the movies? And now they are doing what only a good friend can do -- tell you the truth about yourself, straight, no b.s. Quit pissing on the French and thank them for getting it right for once. You know, you really should have traveled more (like once) before you took over. Your ignorance of the world has not only made you look stupid, it has painted you into a corner you can't get out of.

Well, cheer up -- there IS good news. If you do go through with this war, more than likely it will be over soon because I'm guessing there aren't a lot of Iraqis willing to lay down their lives to protect Saddam Hussein. After you "win" the war, you will enjoy a huge bump in the popularity polls as everyone loves a winner -- and who doesn't like to see a good ass-whoopin' every now and then (especially when it 's some third world ass!). So try your best to ride this victory all the way to next year's election. Of course, that's still a long ways away, so we'll all get to have a good hardy-har-har while we watch the economy sink even further down the toilet!

But, hey, who knows -- maybe you'll find Osama a few days before the election! See, start thinking like THAT! Keep hope alive! Kill Iraqis -- they got our oil!!

Yours,

Michael Moore
www.michaelmoore.com

This had been kicked around the web a million times but it's pretty funny. Check it out.

Cinnamon shower | Seal | Models Have Small Boobs

French | Art | Rent A Priest | Art | Best Flash Ever

Bearded Women | Bug Eater | Art | Rock Posters

Raver Chicks Sure Are Crazy | Baghdad Snapshots

Bowling For Columbine | Homo Sweet Homo

ALF Star Caught Smoking Crack! Pix 1 Pix 2

OMG HOT HOT Torrie Wilson Playboy Pix

System of a Down | Plug | Plug | Plug

3/14/03

Jean-Claude Van Damme Cinematic Retrospective

Do NOT Go In There | Fantastic | SUPERSHIP

Flashtastic | Art | Chainsaw Guitar | Art | Pervert

Dirty | Talk | Mr Brains Pork Faggots | B-Boys

Perfect | Homofag | Nuts | Mr Awesome

3/11/03

Sup butt nuts? I'm surprised to announce that we've actually filled the CrazyAss13 fantasy baseball league. So if you missed out on that shit, better luck next year.

Waste Of Technology | Justin Timberlake Gay Porn

Britney Skates | GANGURO | Art | Robots | Rock N Roll

Art | Sandwhich | Free Comics | ????? | Rubik's Cube

Macrame Owls | Awesome Dude | Awesome Dude

3/07/03

Fantasy Baseball Bitches!

http://baseball.fantasysports.yahoo.com/b1

League?ID#: 149959
Password: stuntmock
Draft?Type: Live
Draft?Time: Friday, March 21 at 2:45 pm CST
Maximum?Number?of?Teams: 12
Maximum?Players?on?a?Team: 25
Player?Universe: All baseball
Maximum?Moves: No maximum
Maximum?Trades: No maximum
Scoring?Type: Rotisserie League
Waiver?Time: 2 days
Last?Trade?Date: Sunday, August 10
Trade?Reject?Time: 2 days
Maximum?Games: 162
Maximum?Innings: 1250
Retroactive?Stats: No
Roster Changes: Daily
Starting?Positions: C, 1B, 2B, 3B, SS, OF, OF, OF, Util, SP, SP, RP, RP, P, P, P, DL, DL
Statistical Categories (Batters): Runs
Home Runs, Runs Batted In, Stolen Bases, Batting Average
Statistical Categories (Pitchers): Wins, Saves, Strikeouts, Earned Run Average, (Walks + Hits)/ Innings Pitched

DO IT!

3/06/03

SEXY!

Funkyshit | I Hate People | Urinal Poop | Art

Cyber | Rape | Hole In The | Midgets

Art | Dick | UFO | Fire | Tatu | bOg

Fat Midget sent me this frightening link.

The webmaster at Naughty School Girls Dot Net asked me for a plug and I'm giving him one.

Thanks go out to Megarad and Linkswarm for sending me mad traffic.

The worlds biggest Jake Plummer fan, Mr Pickles, sent me this.

I've saved the best for last, my buddy Brenton sent me this one and if you've never read it, you should because it is the major funny.

2/26/03

Chinamen Eat Babies* | Tampon Art

Crazy Fishheads

Gomer Sex Scandal | Red Beard | White Trash

Lez Reds

Decapitated Reggie | Cowfucks Ban Books

Dyke-Jumper

This update was created with the help of the Racial Slur Database** and was not meant to offend Chinamen, Fishheads, Gomers, Red Beards, White Trash, Reds, Reggies, Cowfucks, and or Dyke-Jumpers.

*Thanks Apechild

** Thanks Outbreed

2/25/03

First up a special thanks* to Fox 99.3 for blowing up my hits this week. If your coming from that site the Japan ass skirts are below.

As for the ass skirts a reader sent me another link debunking the whole thing, and one dude sent a link to some "real" see thru clothing. Oh and because I keep getting emails, I do not sell, nore do I know where you can buy these skirts that do not exist.

Here are some more dumb links for you.

Irony | Switch | Nerds | War | Gay | Art | Art | Art | Ape

*not special

2/19/03

Errr just because I've had a few people email me, yes I'm pretty sure the Japan ass skirts are photoshoped.

http://www.snopes.com/photos/skirts.asp

2/17/03

Japan Fashion

They are not see-thru skirts. They are prints on the skirts to make it look as if the panties are visible and are all the rage in Japan.

Flash | Uncle Fucker | Break Dance | ????? | Trailer

This has to be the stupidest headline ever.

Confound | Redbrain

Holy Crap! 58 great AC/DC tribute bands!

Jesus Was A User | Matrix Trailer | Hulk Trailer

Why Must We Be So Perverted | Parody Spam Scam.

This is the coolest thing ever! My favorite rioters are Party 20, he's kind of a ham but Party 44, and Party 32 because he is such a hot piece of ass. Is anyone else thinking G N R rioter trading cards? I know I am.

Ole Man Andy | 100 Bad Films | Newmoanyeah

I caught some of the Golden Globe Awards last Sunday. After seein

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